Deck The HALLS

“The show must go on. Or work.”

“Dust off and get up.”

“Flex your ‘can do’ muscle.”

“Seize the day.”

 I’ve been sick for the better part of two weeks now.   Good old Maryland, the land of the never-ending sinus infection. Coughing, sneezing, wheezing, and just generally feeling like crap. But, I’ve done my best to push through, continue going to work, continue training hard. Despite coughing fits and almost choking to death, you have to try to keep on going…

And in the process, I’ve been living off of Halls cough drops. With a pocketful at all times during my training sessions, they have given me the greatest odds of at least getting through my workouts without falling over from spastic fits of lung suffocation.

I took one out of my pocket last week, and realized something interesting for the first time: Halls cough drops have invaded my head and stolen my perspective! Yes, the above motivational quotes, although somewhat corny, are actually taken from the wrappers of Halls cough drops.

I somehow never got the memo that Halls had invented the most brilliant marketing campaign of the last decade. I mean, what are cough drops for, after all? They’re for times when you know you’re sick and feel like crap, but need to keep pushing, keep putting your best foot forward and powering through conditions that would stop most others in their tracks. When others are throwing their own little pity parties, you are tougher than that, and instead reach for a Halls cough drop, peel back the wrapper, pop it in your mouth, and continue building your own little mini empire in this world.

I’ve been beating my clients over the head with similar motivational quotes for the past decade now, though mine might not be quite as cute, short, or sweet. Luckily, I get pages upon pages to blither, as well as a podcast, where I can basically ramble at-length on any topic my heart desires. More than a 1”x1” wrapper, where you have to capture the essence of “being a badass” in six words or less.

But it’s good to know I have a brother-in-arms, dear Halls cough drops. For those times when you want to lay down and quit, lay down and die, lay down and cough yourself into oblivion; for those days when you are dreading the prospect of the stepper, the squat rack, and anything else that will leave chunks of lung matter strewn across the rubber matting. For those times when the idea of pushing forward is simply painful to your soul, well, fear not little soldier, Halls cough drops has figured out the formula: both metaphorically, and now quite literally, you need to suck it up.

And thus these little gems in your pocket, that allow for continued movement and success at times when the odds are stacked against you. So we stack the deck, make sure we have some tools, albeit primitive, to weather through obstacles. Stack the deck, and deck the halls.

“Conquer today.” Yes, Halls cough drops, I think I will. “It’s yours for the taking.” You’re goddamned right it is—this is my universe, to be rebuilt in the image I have in my mind. With a little assistance, of course, from a cough drop.

We find motivation in many strange corners. While not as moving as an historical speech from a great leader, I commend you, Halls cough drops, for allowing us all to hold ourselves to a higher standard. Keep on keeping on with your motivational goodness.

-David A. Johnston